There has long been a stigma surrounding sex toys and while that is slowly changing, it can make men feel uncomfortable when broaching the subject with their partner. If you would like to try male sex toys but do not know how to bring the subject up and discuss it with your partner, then this article might help you build up confidence. Here’s what you need to know.
1. Choose the right time
Finding the right time to discuss sex toys can be difficult, but there are definitely times when it’s not OK to bring it up. If your partner has just got home from a stressful day at work for example, then perhaps bringing the subject up the second they get through the door isn’t a good idea. Try and orchestrate the perfect time by ensuring that your partner is as relaxed, comfortable and receptive as possible.
2. Ease into it gently
Don’t just bowl into the conversation with: “I want this”. Do some research and look at the benefits of using sex toys and then try and share them with your partner. Ask them what they think and if it is something that they would be interested in exploring?
3. Be confident
Remember that using male sex toys doesn’t necessarily have to involve your partner. If she has vibrators and other female sex toys of her own, then the thought of you owning a male masturbator shouldn’t bother her. In any case, you need to be confident of the fact that not only do you deserve to own your sexuality, but you have every right to sex toys just as she does.
If your partner can’t seem to get on board with the idea, then perhaps you may wish to reconsider your choice of companion entirely as those double standards do not bode well for the future of your relationship.
4. Reassure your partner
Let your partner know why you are interested in sex toys. If you would like to introduce some into your sexual relationship and share them, then hopefully she will be more receptive. However, if you want a male masturbator for personal use, then you need to reassure your partner that it will not affect your sex life and that you will still pay plenty of attention to her.
5. Shop for sex toys online together
When you broach the subject appropriately, all going well your partner will be interested in having a look at what’s available. Do some research and shop online together and she may even have some suggestions for you.
6. Let them take control
One approach is to consider app-controlled sex toys that your partner can control. There are a number of different masturbation sleeves with multiple vibration settings and if your partner can feel more involved then they may be more open to the idea.
Be true to yourself
Again, it’s important that you are honest with yourself about what you want and what you deserve. If your partner won’t allow you to buy a male masturbator because they don’t want you watching porn and masturbating full-stop, then perhaps it’s time to reconsider your relationship. In a true, healthy relationship built on trust, it shouldn’t be an issue whatsoever.