The times are changing. Traditionally, in a relationship, men led while women submitted – a pattern followed for centuries. Today more and more women are taking charge. Enter women’s empowerment and female-led relationships (FLR).
Here, the woman becomes the dominant partner. It functions just as a male-led relationship does, except that the majority of decisions and the financial management aspects are led by the female.
Let’s take a look at the 12 characteristics of a female-led relationship.
1. The Female Makes Decisions
As opposed to a man-led relationship, here the female decides. This works really well, especially if the partner is in support of not giving in to traditional stereotypes. The final say lies with her and her alone.
Whether it’s a financial decision or something as simple as planning for the weekend, the female takes the principal role of deciding, while taking into consideration the opinion and views of her partner.
2. The Man Does Household Chores
In a traditional relationship, it’s often the female who does household chores such as cleaning, caregiving and cooking. However, in a female-led relationship, while responsibilities and chores can be distributed, the man often takes on more chores than the woman.
This is essentially a good thing. A 2012 study has shown that men who take on more household chores are generally happier than their counterparts who avoid doing tasks such as cleaning, cooking, shopping or caregiving.
3. The Female Can Construct The Relationship
Given that this is a female-led relationship, she can change the dynamics of the relationship in any way she sees appropriate. If there’s something about the behavior of her man she is uncomfortable with, she may decide on a course of action immediately. For instance, if her partner is constantly drinking and this bothers her, she will tell her partner to stop doing it.
In some cases, men aren’t ready to deal with this type of relationship as it can appear to be controlling and demanding. However, there are many men who are fine with this and are ready to accept that the female’s point of view may be correct.
4. The Female Manages Everything
Women are known to be financially smart. In a female-led relationship, the lady manages everything from career to finances to socializing. Of course, she’ll still ask for your opinion and advice. However, the final decision lies with her. If she thinks your advice or opinion does not have much merit, she won’t take it.
In a female-led relationship, the wife could be the one going out to work while the husband stays home and manages the house. This is completely opposite to a traditional relationship where the male is in charge of bringing home the money.
5. The Female Dominates in The Bedroom
In a female-led relationship, the woman could also be the dominant one in matters of intimacy and desire. As opposed to a traditional relationship, where the man usually takes the lead, in a female-led one, the woman will tell you what she expects from you in the bedroom.
Here, the woman has full control over what she wants and how she wants it to happen. Of course, if she loves you, she’ll also take into consideration your needs and wants. But she will take over the reins in the bedroom, initiate and guide you into doing things the way she wants. You can take a closer look at the link between femininity, masculinity, and leadership in this study.
6. The Female and Male Can Swap Roles
In a healthy female-led relationship, both sides make adjustments in their roles. Here, the roles are not as strictly defined as in the case of a traditional relationship, where the man leads. An FLR is much more flexible.
For example, where household work is involved, either the man or the woman could take up the larger share of the work. This also means that if children are involved, either party can take on caregiving responsibilities, regardless of the gender.
7. More Freedom of Speech
Given that a woman is naturally expressive, a female-led relationship would also be a more open one, where communication is involved. In a male-led relationship, women do not have any say in matters that concern both partners since the male is the final authority.
In an FLR, on the other hand, both parties can express what they want freely, without it being held against either one of them. Even when there’s an argument, while the woman may have the upper hand in decision making, both sides are free to speak out their concerns in order to solve the conflict.
8. The Man is Secure in His Masculinity
Male-led relationships have been the norm for so long that not all men are secure enough to be in a female-led one. Social norms often make it difficult for men to accept domination by a woman. In order to have such a kind of relationship, the man must be secure in his masculinity.
Men who are secure enough, find such a relationship to be a breath of fresh air. Since their female partners are in control of everything, their burden of responsibility is reduced. They find themselves enjoying a female-led relationship as there are fewer things to worry and think about, as compared to when they are the dominant partner in the relationship.
9. Both Parties are Independent and Nurturing
Again, both parties must be independent and nurturing to make this relationship work. If the female isn’t independent enough, this will no longer be a female-led relationship. Her ability to stand on her own, no matter what situation she is in, helps her decide, manage and control the relationship.
Her partner should also be independent enough to not suffocate her. He should also have a nurturing side to him, given the switch in roles. While she’s in charge of controlling and managing, he’s responsible for taking on nurturing duties such as taking care of the kids, if any and running the home.
10. Female-led Relationships Don’t Disempower Men
It’s easy to think that given this switch in roles and dynamics, this kind of setup disempowers men. But that does not have to be true. You’d be surprised that most men who willingly choose a female-led relationship feel empowered, and are even better partners.
Some men prefer that their female partners take on the decision-making role and manage things. This reduces their burden of having to take up stereotypical roles where they have to do tasks they aren’t necessarily good at, such as managing finances.
11. Equality and Fairness
Compared to when men have the authority in a relationship, women are more willing to share power than men. Even when women hold the controls a, female alphas often do not misuse their power to hurt their partners but rather, make sure the relationship takes the right turn.
The female partner, in such a relationship, invites suggestions on aspects such as financial goals or who would be doing the household chores for the night. She sees her male partner as an equal, despite the change in roles.
When she feels capable, she will gladly share household chores with her male partner. There’s no power struggle in this kind of setup as long as the female partner manages and controls the important aspects of a relationship.
12. There is More Love
With this dynamic relationship, especially when both parties are able to contribute efficiently, there is more love shared. The female partner lifts the burden off by managing and controlling the relationship, while the man also handles the caregiving roles.
Even as both work on their careers, they help each other by destroying traditional gender stereotypes. The female will feel more loved and appreciated when he’s taking care of her and the family better, and the man will appreciate her handling finances and making difficult decisions.
While not the norm in terms of how relationships work, female-led relationships are gaining popularity, and working wonderfully, as well. A female-led relationship refuses to accept any gender stereotype or give in to societal norms. They survive and thrive on their own dynamics.
Any relationship requires a lot of work. With love, trust and a lot of understanding, a female-led relationship can bring both partners together and help them be more connected.